I was raised Catholic. Baptized, confirmed, and married in the Catholic Church. I even attended a Catholic high school where for two year I was the teacher's aid to the priest that was assigned to our school. His name is Father Steve. He had an impact on my life in ways that I can't quite explain. He refused to call Religion class "religion" and instead opted for the term "Theology" class. He said that religion isn't something you can learn, religion is a part of who you are. He was keen on the subject of philosophy, which, to this day, 20 years or so later, has resonated with me. Philosophy became a huge interest of mine. And how he referenced religion as something that can't be taught... this stuck with me. In college, I chose elective classes like philosophy and world religions. I was fascinated by the concept of religion. I was a practicing Catholic for a long time. I even had Father Steve officiate my wedding. Through the last ten years or so, I've questioned my faith. I found myself trying to cling to the teachings of my upbringing, even getting a large tattoo of the Virgin Mary, the Our Lady of Guadalupe in my mid 20s (and no, I don't regret it). But in this last decade or so, I've came to identify myself as a deist. I still remember reading the definition of deism in the philosophy section of my family's old encyclopedia volumes. The books were bound with a navy blue, leather like material and had metallic gold writing on the fronts and sides. Deism is defined as a belief in the existence of a supreme being, specifically of a creator who does not intervene in the universe. To me, that just made sense. And it took me almost 20 years to be able to feel comfortable even admitting it. Not being a christian in the midwest is definitely not the norm, let alone, when my dad is what I call a "hardcore" catholic. His screensaver on his phone is of the Sacred Heart, which is also up on the wall of his home, along with the Our Lady of Guadalupe. There were even times where he had holy water hand dippers at the entrance of our home. My two sons know who Jesus is, because of my dad. And I am very appreciative of that. They've also experienced a bit of loss. The passing of their grandfather, my former father-in-law as well as their great-grandpa, also on their dad's side. Attempting to explain death to a young child can be very challenging, especially when I don't believe in heaven or hell. I don't ever tell them that their isn't one of the other, I simply say that some people believe in it and some people don't. I am just one of the ones who doesn't. I'm not here to spew my beliefs on anyone, or even try to change anyone's opinion. My beliefs are my own. And that's the message I'm trying to convey. I believe that we are all allowed to have our own beliefs, faiths, views, etc. I also don't think that people choose what they believe in. I think that your beliefs are to your core and that the only way to change that is to educate yourself. And this applies to just about everything. Everyone is ignorant to something, and it's through the process of learning and listening that we can become better human beings, more accepting of others.
I read an article a while back by Scientific American that referenced study published by a Journal of Applied Social Psychology about Harry Potter. It's known that an effective ways of improving negative prejudices and attitudes is through intergroup contact. In other words, get to know the people or groups that you don't necessarily identify with and you may be surprised about the things you have in common, and you will have a better picture of why its ok to have different beliefs and views. In this study, they found that people who read the Harry Potter series, fell into this more empathetic group, without even having the intergroup contact. They were able to see the characters ostracized and bullied. Take the muggle or half-blood references out, some of these readers were translating that real life. Again, just another example of how educating yourself can be a positive thing.
I was picking up Monroe from kindergarten this past Friday, when he began telling his brother how some people are going to be celebrating starting this weekend and that they get to celebrate for 8 days! That was the kicker to him. Eight days of celebrating is a LOT to a 5 year old. He couldn't remember what is was called, so I suggested, Hanukkah. He lit up and said, "THAT'S IT!" Lennon of course, heard Monica, and began telling us a story about a Monica in his pre-k class. After Monroe corrected him, he simply asked, "Mom, what's Hanukkah?" I could have just sloughed it off as something he didn't need to know about because he wasn't, I'm not, my family is not Jewish. But instead I took Monroe and Lennon to a craft store in search of the Hanukkah section. On a narrow end-cap we found a small menorah. We grabbed the menorah, along with a nativity scene craft. The cashier seemed a little confused, but was pleasant all the same. In the evening, post bedtime, I decided to refresh my memories of the meaning of Hanukkah and how I could share this with my boys. I googled things like "Hanukkah for kids" and "Hanukkah for dummies." Even saved a tasty looking recipe for potato latke. I don't plan on this being a theology lesson to my kids, but more of an educating moment. Even teaching them what Christmas is actually about. That it's not just Santa and his reindeer bringing them presents, but it's the celebrating the birth of Jesus. I think that physically using a nativity scene and using a menorah (or hanukiah) is not a disrespectful gesture, but more of a way to accurately convey these two beliefs to my children. A way for them to actually interact with these different beliefs. I will be showing them the order at which the candles are placed in the menorah, the order in which they are lit. We will do this at sunset tonight. Even teaching them why we are doing it after sunset. In hopes of ultimately teaching them that there are all kinds of things out there that make people different; religion being just one of those things. And instead of being afraid of it, embrace it, try to understand it. The world is their oyster.
Click here for the article written by Scientific America.
I also want to note that I am fully aware that there are loads of other religions not being represented here. These were the two I chose to begin to teach my 4 & 5 year old about. I'm not sure they're ready for Zoroastrianism just yet!
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